To my girl ✨

As I sit here wide awake & think Im starting to realize that me & you had a really bad childhood , well , they weren’t that bad , but they weren’t that
good . πŸ˜”
I started thinking that maybe my brother brought us together that night in November to fix each other , by falling completely in love with each other . ❀️
If my brother planned this why did we break up so many times & what not ?
Maybe because he didn’t want our relationship to be perfect . So we had our ups & downs .. Just like our childhood ..
You told me about your mom & I told you about my mom ..
I told you about the ups & the downs & you told me about the ups & the downs .
We cried to each other .
& we cried with each other .
Like recently , when you broke down to me about your mom & why you did what you did to be put in the hospital broke me completely πŸ˜”
If broke me because I wish I could’ve been there to change all that , but I wasn’t & it happened & I’m just SO thankful you’re here today ❀️ Because like I broke down to you & I told you that you make me feel safe . I truly do need you desirae . ❀️
It kinda all just makes sense to me now .
Two broken souls brought together to fall completely in love with one another ? πŸ’œ
That could be .
But whatever the reason I’m surely glad I went to that football game 🏈✨ because I use to say things like ” I hate my life ” & what not , but now that I think about it .
I had to go through every hard time to get to you , so I wouldn’t change anything about my life because for once I can actually have a real smile on my face & honestly say “
I love my life , because my amazing girlfriend Desirae Autumn Alvarez . ” πŸ’—

✨ Life finally makes sense because I met my dream girl . LITERALLY MY DREAM
GIRL ! ✨

Bro πŸ‘ΌπŸ’™

NOT A Day Goes By When I Dont Think About You..NOT A Day Goes By When I Wish You Were Here! Here To Talk , Here To See You, Here To Feel You, Here To See How Amazing You Would Of Turned Out To Be As My Brother, A Son, A Grandson, A Uncle, & Here To STAY!!! :”/ You Were Just A Little Baby When God Needed You To Go Home.. But Now Your Almost 15.. On Your Birthday I PROMISE Ill Go Visit You Its Just So Hard To Stand Over Your Grave I Just Dont Want To Believe It But Its Been 13 Almost 14 Years That I Had To Breathe In And Breath Out Because I Cant Breathe As Well When I Cry.. Its Okay To Cry.. I Have To Break Down Sometimes.. Sometimes I Just Look At Your Picture In A Frame That I Have In My Room & I Cry.. I NEVER Cry In Front Of Family.. I NEVER Cry When I Go To Visit You.. I CANT… I Have To Be Strong For Mommy & Daddy. I HAVE To Be Strong For The Family..
I Remember One Time I Was With Our Nephew Brandon In My Room & I Was Holding Him & I Pointed At Your Picture In The Frame & I Said ” Brandon Thats Your Uncle. Hes In Heaven With Angels.” & He Pointed At The Picture & Put His Finger To His Eye.. I don’t Really hbbmKnow What That Means.. But I Smiled Anyways.. There Are Times When Our Nephew Giggles & Does Random Stuff Is It Because You’re Here? I Know You’re Here, Because I Might Not See You But I Feel You.. You’re Watching Over The Family & I.. Or You’re With Us Sometimes We Just Cant See You.. Well There Has To Be A Reason Or Many Reasons Why God Needed You So Early.. I Would Like To Know That Reason.. But Every Thing Happens For A Reason.. I Cant Change The Fact Thats You’re Gone.. But I Wish You Were Here.. Id Do Anything To Have My Big Brother Here.. I Know You’re Reading This As I Write.. I Have So Much I Want To Say, But I Cant Because It Would Be Amazing Saying It Face To Face…. But You’re In Heaven…A BETTER Place… So As I Rap Up This Writing Remember that I will Have A Lot More To Say In The Future.. You’re Gone but NEVER Forgotten..
Rest In Paradise Brother.. & When The Day Comes When My Life Is Over I Know You Will Be Waiting At The Gate To Welcome Me Home.. But You’re Going To Have To Wait A Little While, Because Im Not Ready Yet.. So Dont Have To Much Fun Without Me.. I LOVE YOU!!!

PS-Heaven Got Another Angel The Night You Left This World Behind… Heaven Got A Little Better The Day God Took You Away From Me… Im Missing You.. Ill See You Again Sometime For Now, Ill Close My Eyes And Dream Of Heaven… πŸ™πŸ‘ΌπŸ’˜βœ¨

Bro πŸ‘ΌπŸ’™

As I lay in this cold house in this cold empty bedroom I realize my brothers gone… He gone away to sleep with the Angels … Not just for tonight , but forever.. I know he’s safe close to my heart , So I don’t have to worry about being left behind here in this cold cold world … cause one day ill rise from this cold world to the clouds in the sky & reach a bright wonderland called heaven… where I will see my brother opening up the gate to welcome me home & all my worries will fade away & ill be gone..
Gone to heaven πŸ™

Heaven is Real πŸ‘ΌπŸ’™

Tonight I went to the movies & saw the movie Heaven is Real & I went with a very special person .
My girlfriend Desirae πŸ’—
& I believe in god ,
but after sitting there & watching that movie I understand why I believe in him so much .
For example when Desirae took a bunch of pills & ended to in the hospital I cried my eyes out & just prayed & I know god answered my prayers ,
because she’s still here . πŸ’•

No one can make me cry , 
make me laugh , 
make me smile , 
or drive me mad , 
like she does . 
It’s like a curse that is the cure .
Better or worse , 
one things for sure , 
it’s real love .
& I don’t know what 
I’d do if I lost it . ❀️

No one can make me cry ,
make me laugh ,
make me smile ,
or drive me mad ,
like she does .
It’s like a curse that is the cure .
Better or worse ,
one things for sure ,
it’s real love .
& I don’t know what
I’d do if I lost it . ❀️

Today’s April 19,2014 & I went on my first date with a girl that is very special to me & I’m glad she was the first person to take me on my first date . 😻
It was small , but big to me , because everything matters when it comes to her . ❀️

Today’s April 19,2014 & I went on my first date with a girl that is very special to me & I’m glad she was the first person to take me on my first date . 😻
It was small , but big to me , because everything matters when it comes to her . ❀️

Every year before Easter we go to my grandmas house & color eggs & I’ve watched my sisters bring someone they love & I was too little to understand , but now that I’m older I understand a lot . Desirae was the first person that I’ve brought to my grandmas to color eggs & I know for sure she’s going to be there every year before Easter . πŸ£πŸ’—

Every year before Easter we go to my grandmas house & color eggs & I’ve watched my sisters bring someone they love & I was too little to understand , but now that I’m older I understand a lot . Desirae was the first person that I’ve brought to my grandmas to color eggs & I know for sure she’s going to be there every year before Easter . πŸ£πŸ’—

She’s in the process of fixing me & I can feel all the pieces coming together & I can honestly say I’m completely happy with her , because she’s actually doing it . She doesn’t have to . But she wants to & she is . πŸ’—

She’s in the process of fixing me & I can feel all the pieces coming together & I can honestly say I’m completely happy with her , because she’s actually doing it . She doesn’t have to . But she wants to & she is . πŸ’—